Time drags on and sadness, depression, frustration, anxiety, and fear might be getting heavier and heavier – like you’re dragging around a ball and chain. Read on for 5 ideas that could help you capture this time and feel like your making good use of today.
1. Focus on where you are and what you have right now – So many people think they have to walk away from where they are to get what they want. And some people do need a safer, more secure environment to start. But if things are generally good, you just feel like you’re spinning your wheels and running in place, focus on all the ways you can move forward right where you are.
2. Pull your chair up to the table in small ways – Start with how you sit in your life today. Do you come off your plans for the day and quickly adjust to others? Consider the small step of sticking to your plans and working the plans of others around the commitments you have already made. You may get some resistance but expect it and be confidently firm in negotiating another option for others. It won’t be long until others will start to ask what you have planned instead of assuming you’ll just waiting for something to do!
3. Schedule yourself in your day – Maybe a place to start would be to make sure your plans are scheduled and others know what you’re working on that day. Whether it’s an online calendar or a paper one, it would be a great place to start to block off time for you. Even scheduling free time to consider what you’d like to do more of right where you are is a good way to explore this idea.
4. Shift your self-talk – Consider if your self-talk reflects your excitement along with any angst over the changes. You may feel uncomfortable, or even a little afraid to put yourself out there too much. It could be you’ve been on the sidelines a little more than you realize. Be patient with yourself and with others and develop a few mantras to turn down negative self-talk and add hopeful, exciting, curious words. It could be something like “It’s uncomfortable but this will be good for me”.
5. Communicate with compassion – Whether it’s words to yourself or words to others, it could be more fun to wrap this journey in the emotion of compassion. Be gentle with yourself and others through this time of change and let that gentleness be reflected in the words you say to yourself and others. It could conserve energy you can better use to take action toward more of what you’d like to have in your life.
Adding these 5 things just might make the rest of 2020 a little more productive and be what you need to make time work for you, lighten the load, and make a happier life right where you are.
Need some help working through these ideas? Just schedule an appointment here or give me a call.
Dianne Presley, LCSW, BC-TMH
Believe, Hope, Inspire Wellness Services LLC
Anxiety, Depression, Loss and Relationship Therapy
Gottman Level 1 and Level 2 Trained Couples Method Therapist
Gottman Trained in Traumas and Affairs and in Couples in Addiction
Gottman Educator in 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work and Bringing Baby Home
Certified Brain Based Success Coach